List o’ Top Ten Crap

I’m trying to decide if I’ve failed miserably, or succeeded beyond any expectations anyone’s ever had of me. On the one hand I haven’t consumed as much media as I a) usually do, b) claim to or c) technically should do based on my participation on this blog (despite how rarely it is updated), whereas on the other hand, I’ve dedicated time to other worthwhile projects. Suffice to say, I haven’t seen/read/heard/participated in/consumed 10 of any medium that I would list as top. I might have top 10 films I planned on seeing, but never did, but for most of those, you can just see my colleague’s lists because I’ve missed most of those movies.

So, as a result, what follows is a list of 10 things that I would put at number one, or at least in the top five, of a list devoted to each topic. You’ll get it.

10. Film: “UP.” I was reluctant to go see “Up” because I’m so loyal. My favorite movie of 2008 (and yet to be supplanted) was “Wall-E,” and after hearing about how great “Up” is, I was scared I’d like it more than “Wall-E.” Having seen it, I can confirm that I don’t love it as much as “Wall-E,” but I do love it more than anything I can remember seeing this year. It’s beautiful both visually and in its story which is often a balance that a lot of films lack. Runner up: “Zombieland”: Saw it twice in theaters, so that’s got to count for something.

9. Music: Rancid, “Let the Dominoes Fall.” Despite the fact that I try to support the music industry as much as possible, a lot of new releases slipped through my fingertips this year. However, Rancid’s been my favorite band since 5th grade, so I wasn’t going to let this one go. With this album, they dropped the poppy crap from the previous album, and wrote my new favorite Rancid-styled ska tune, and in my opinion wrote a song that actually sounds like they’re from California. Runners up: I actually didn’t love too much that came out this year, but in 2009 I did discover a lot of bands I haven’t listened to previously such as The Loved Ones, The Postal Service, Alkaline Trio, The Ting Tings, and Dead To Me. Also, One Man Army re-emerged as my favorite band. Finally, my band’s first CD came out in 2009….available in stores everywhere!

8. Books: “Harry and Horsie,” Written by Kate van Camp; Illustrated by Lincoln Agnew. This seems like a huge cop out, but my favorite book of 2009 was this children’s picture book. It’s got a very typical “use your imagination and you’re not alone” type of story, which is sweet and all, but the art absolutely blows me away. I’m no art critic, but if I could have a print of every page from this book spread out among the walls on my apartment, I absolutely would. I had a few email exchanges with Mr. Agnew, and he’s a really nice guy. I’m bringing this book with me when I get my next tattoo so that my artist knows what to draw. Runners Up: Both my favorite non-fiction and favorite YA authors, Chuck Klosterman and Barry Lyga respectively, released new books within a week of each other, and I loved them both.

7. Comic: “Blankets” by Craig Thompson. Full disclosure: I don’t really read a lot of comics. I don’t keep up with any of the popular series, and only occasionally read a “lit comic,” all of which would surprise my employer because I’ve been deemed the go to graphic novel guy. This is ok with me because most people that work in the graphic novel field are a lot cooler than those in the general publishing field. Suffice to say, I’m not necessarily behind the times in comics—ok, yeah I am. I was at a conference in Chicago and went to a panel featuring Neil Gaiman, Craig Thompson and…I can’t remember who else. Anyway, Thompson talked about “Blankets” and it totally peaked my interest, so I borrowed it from Pauly to give it a go. If you don’t know, a large part of the story is about a long distance relationship, and I read it on an airplane to China, where I would be arriving and not talking to my girlfriend for two weeks. That sucked. Loved the book though.

6. TV Show: “Chuck.” This is another case where it’s new to me in 2009, but not new to the world. I’m pretty bad at keeping up with new TV. I loved the first three episodes of “Flash Forward” a show that would have been my TV Show pick, but then I went away for a few weeks, and never caught up despite the fact that every episode is still saved on my DVR. However, with “Chuck” I was able to watch the entire first season on Blu-Ray and stay committed through the second season. I even dedicated a few minutes to the “Save Chuck” campaign, and am psyched that it starts back up January 10. “Chuck” is funny, “action-packed,” geeky, and features a really super hot chick that’s often in just her underwear. I’m sold. Runner Up: “30 Rock.”

5. Concert: The Casket Architects at Snapper McGees, Kingston, NY. This was a case of “I don’t love this band’s CDs, but I can probably get in for free and I have nothing else to do, so why the hell not?” Glad I went. The opening bands were fantastic—I particularly recommend Long Island’s own Love Panther—but when the three piece Casket Architects set up their gear and hit their set at 1000 miles per hour, I was blown away. One of the best, tightest and most exciting live bands I’ve ever seen. Runner Up: Flogging Molly with The Aggrolites at Hammerstein Ballroom, NYC. I’ve seen Flogging Molly over 30 times and they’re starting to lose their specialness with me, but the Aggrolites kicked ass.

4. Burger: The Primehouse in NYC. This might be getting away from the pop-culture aspect of the blog and list, but most of us are “foodies” on some level, and I for one have been searching for the best burger of my life for most, if not all of 2009. I think I found it. At The Primhouse, I ordered the “Blue Cheese Burger” which featured a thick, juicy beef patty, melted blue cheese, and the most amazing bacon I’ve ever had (I would actually liken it more to fried sliced pork belly than bacon). Coupled with fries, it might have been the best burger-related dining experience I’ve ever had. Sure, it’s more money than I would spend on a burger if I was paying (this was a business lunch), and because they stop serving burgers after lunch (which ends at 4PM), it’s likely I’ll never have it again, and that adds to the mystique, but as of now, this is the burger to which all others are measured. Runner Up: The Tavern, Croton-on-Hudson, NY. I didn’t discover the Tavern in 2009, but every burger I have there is the best burger I’ve had (besides the Primehouse).

3. Restaurant: Cezari in Bologna, Italy. I’m a Jew from New York, so I’m inherently and Italian food snob. To think my trip to Italy this past March wasn't made 9/10th for food and 1/10th for work would just be wrong, stupid, and frankly irresponsible. In my 9 day trip, three dinners were at Cesari, where I had everything from the typical (ravioli) to the new (artichoke flan). The meals were multi-coursed and each course was top notch. Leaving no detail out, the house wine was amazing, and the after-dinner drink, homemade blueberry grappa had none of the turpentine like quality of other grappas and left me and my bosses literally stumbling back to the hotel. It’s weird to say, but this might be my favorite restaurant in the entire world. Runner Up: Blue Smoke. This, yet again, isn’t a new 2009 discovery, but it might be my favorite restaurant in New York City, and I ate there at least twice this year. I need to make that happen more often.

2. Beer: In a year that featured Seth in Germany, Seth in London and Seth discovering new places to drink loads of different beers in New York City, my favorite new beer of 2009—to probably no one’s surprise—comes from the always reliable Samuel Adams Brewery. Featured in the 2009 Harvest Brews pack, the Sam Adam’s Dunkleweisen is a not too dark fall beer with a gamut of flavors including my favorite: pumpkin. Sadly I couldn’t find this beer available outside the pack, so we’re looking at 16-18 bucks for two bottles, but I’ll be damned if it’s not awesome. Runner Up: Hefeweisen in Germany. Seriously, you order by the type of beer, not the brand. Every time I ordered Hefeweisen or Wheat Beer, it was a good night.

1. I Hate Humanity: Mtv’s “Jersey Shore.” I’ve never seen this show, but having gone to Hofstra University, and with the understanding that the douche bags on this show are those douche bags taken to the next extreme, I don’t feel this is an accident that I need to rubberneck for. And thanks to Chris’s pointing out of this, I feel like I know everything that has happened or will happen in this show. Runners Up: The father in question in this article. A large proportion of the people who commented on this article. Anyone offended by the Oxford American Dictionary’s inclusion of the word “Teabagger.”